A sermon preached on May 15th, 2022 based upon John 13:34-35 and Acts 11:1-18 entitled, “The Holy Spirit Makes the Circle Wide Where There is a Willingness to be in Relationship.”
I want to begin with two verses from the Gospel lesson. These are words spoken by Jesus to his disciples in John’s Gospel as part of extended parting words. He said, “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (John 13:34-35)
This past Tuesday we decided to indefinitely postpone the Interfaith Luncheon that was planned for today because of concerns about the rising Covid numbers. I was disappointed, but I am hopeful that the dream will come to fruition during Pastor Marissa’s tenure.
The Interfaith Luncheon had me thinking about what I would say if I were to try and express the essence of Christianity. The verses I just read are a good place to start. At the heart of our faith is loving relationship, beginning with God through Jesus, and extending all other human beings.
Christianity isn’t a set of rules. There is only one rule: that in every opportunity we have to be in relationship with other people – (and for that matter, other living beings) — we are to love like Jesus. Jesus’ great love for each of us is the reference point by which we are to love all others.
In one way the simplicity of this is a relief: we don’t have the burden of remembering a long set of rules we have to keep. But in another way, the simplicity of this distillation confronts us with an enormous, ongoing challenge: As Christians we are compelled to embrace every relationship – whether it be with a stranger or with someone very close at hand — with Jesus love.
The Jewish theologian Martin Buber made a distinction that is helpful here. He talked about there being two basic types of relationships. One he called the “I-Thou” relationship. This is one in which we are fully present to the other in an awareness of the other as a “Thou” – a holy mystery. In contrast, the other kind of relationship Buber called an “I-it” relationship; one in which we objectify the other, fail to be present to their humanity — the deep mystery of their being. When we approach someone as an “it”, we essentially view them only in terms of how they impact our own self-interest.
One of the extraordinary things about Jesus was the quality of attention he gave to whoever was before him. It made no difference to Jesus whether this was a person of great worldly stature or a homeless beggar – he related to each in a way that acknowledged their inherent, sacred worth – a holy “Thou.”
If we are honest, we recognize we spend a great deal of time approaching relationships with an “I-it” mentality. In part, this is the result of laziness. It takes effort to connect with the Holy Thou that is another person. It’s just easier to reduce the person in our minds to an “it” – someone about whom we believe we already know all we need to know.
Most of the condemnation of people that takes place in this world arises from such laziness. Who wants to put out all the energy required to try and learn something about where another person was coming from? Rendering quick judgments is a lot easier.
Unfortunately, distorted forms of religion — including distorted forms of Christianity –often discourage their followers from engaging in “I-Thou” religions, particularly through the way it uses Scripture.
With this as an introduction I want to turn now to our second scripture lesson that comes from the 11th chapter of the Book of Acts. Our reading describes a critical moment in the history of the early church, one that most of us here should be personally appreciative of, because it describes how it came to be that the Church opened its doors to Gentiles.
Jesus and all the disciples were Jews, and up until this point it was simply assumed that to be a Christian you first had to first be a Jew, which meant you were obliged to follow the many laws of the Torah — laws for instance regarding which foods you’re allowed to eat because they are considered clean, as well as the requirement that men undergo circumcision.
The apostles had been present with Jesus when he ate with people the Pharisees considered “sinners” – Jews who in their eyes were failing in obvious ways in keeping the laws of the Torah. In the culture in which they lived, to sit down and share a meal with someone was a very intimate act. Table fellowship necessarily involved I-Thou relationships.
Having witnessed Jesus’ share meals with the so-called “sinners”, the apostles got the message that they should have compassion on Jews who struggled in keeping their faith – but in the Apostles’ minds that was something altogether different from sharing a meal with Gentiles.
Acts 11:1-18
Now the apostles and the believers who were in Judea heard that the Gentiles had also accepted the word of God. So when Peter went up to Jerusalem, the circumcised believers criticized him, saying, “Why did you go to uncircumcised men and eat with them?”
Pause. Peter is being called on the carpet by the authorities back in the home church. He’s getting rebuked for drawing the circle too wide. Their reading of Scripture seems crystal clear to them: They were Jews, so they must maintain their distance from Gentiles, or be rendered unclean.
As I continue reading, notice how Peter responds. He doesn’t argue over scripture, rather he tells them the story of what he has experienced. He says in essence, “that’s how I always saw things too – that’s what I understood scripture to be saying as well. But I’ve seen the Spirit of God move in amazing ways that convinced me God is doing a new thing.”
And to their credit, they really listened to what he has to say.
Then Peter began to explain it to them, step by step, saying,
“I was in the city of Joppa praying, and in a trance I saw a vision. There was something like a large sheet coming down from heaven, being lowered by its four corners; and it came close to me.
As I looked at it closely I saw four-footed animals, beasts of prey, reptiles, and birds of the air. (In other words, unclean animals.)
I also heard a voice saying to me, ‘Get up, Peter; kill and eat.’
But I replied, ‘By no means, Lord; for nothing profane or unclean has ever entered my mouth.’
But a second time the voice answered from heaven, ‘What God has made clean, you must not call profane.’
This happened three times; then everything was pulled up again to heaven.
At that very moment three men — (three Gentile men) — sent to me from Caesarea, arrived at the house where we were.
The Spirit told me to go with them and not to make a distinction between them and us. These six brothers also accompanied me, and we entered the man’s house.
He told us how he had seen the angel standing in his house and saying, ‘Send to Joppa and bring Simon, who is called Peter; he will give you a message by which you and your entire household will be saved.’
And as I began to speak (that is, tell them about Jesus), the Holy Spirit fell upon them just as it had upon us at the beginning.
And I remembered the word of the Lord, how he had said, ‘John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.’
If then God gave them the same gift that he gave us when we believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I that I could hinder God?”
When they heard this, they were silenced. And they praised God, saying, “Then God has given even to the Gentiles the repentance that leads to life.”
When I read this passage at the beginning of the week, I marveled how with this theme of table fellowship spoke directly to our plans for the interfaith luncheon and the I Thou relationships we hoped would occur there between people of different faiths. I was planning to focus my sermon on this connection, but when the luncheon got cancelled my attention was drawn elsewhere.
But first let me just make a couple of remarks regarding what we were aspiring to do with the Interfaith Luncheon where ten Christians, ten Jews, ten Moslems and ten Hindus were going to share a meal together.
I recognize that a big part of why I’m a Christian is the fact I was born into a Christian family living in a largely Christian culture. I know I would see things differently if I was born into some other tradition. Nonetheless, I really do believe that Jesus is the clearest revelation of the heart of God.
I also believe, however that the same Holy Spirit that was at work in Jesus is present in other faith communities. In the story Peter told, his great discovery was that the Holy Spirit was moving in places where he had assumed it would never be found. Just like we can’t control where the wind blows, we can’t control where the Spirit moves. Folks in other faith communities may not call it the “Holy Spirit” – but that doesn’t mean it’s not moving among them. And because it does move among them, I know for a fact that there are plenty of Jews, Moslems and Hindus who live a much more Christ-like life than most of us Christians, and that generally speaking it seems better to encourage them to live faithful lives within their own traditions than to try and convert them to Christianity.
There are a lot of Christians, however who believe that the only reason a Christian should sit down to share a meal with Jews, Moslems and Hindus would be to try and convert them. But if we are to love like Jesus, then we are compelled to try and enter into I-Thou relationships with people of other faiths. So that’s what we were aspiring to do, and I hope someday that will indeed happen.
But to go now in another direction…
Once upon a time Christians assumed that slavery as well as the segregation of races was simply the way God had designed human society. It seemed “natural.” It seemed as obvious as the fact that the earth was flat, and there were scriptures they could point to that seemed to support this belief.
It took a long time, but eventually openings occurred where the Spirit of God could move that brought about a new awareness that slavery and segregation were not at all how God designed things. Christians realized that simply because this had always been the way things were didn’t mean this is what God wants.
The Spirit of God had opportunity to move specifically when there was a willingness to engage in I-Thou relationships with people previously assumed to be inherently inferior, encountering in these relationships people as fully “human” as themselves. The people who resisted the abolition of slavery were people who were determined to see slaves as “its”, not “thous.” Fortunately, over time a consensus developed among Christians that practices once assumed to be in line with how God had designed things were in fact, expressions of sin.
Once upon a time most Christians assumed what the larger culture assumed, which was that women were naturally inferior to men, and should therefore be subordinate to men and that women shouldn’t be permitted to take leadership roles in the church. They had scriptures they could point to that lent support to this notion.
And similar to the case with slavery, in at least some portions of the Church the Spirit of God moved where men were willing to engage in I-Thou relationships with women – leading men to recognize that women were every bit as gifted as men.
And once upon a time pretty much all Christians assumed that homosexuality was unnatural — a form of sin — and that Gay and Lesbian people should be condemned and definitely not allowed to hold leadership positions in the church. There were a hand full of Scriptures to point to that seemed to support this judgment.
And once again the Spirit of God moved in at least parts of the church where there was a willingness to engage in “I Thou” relationships. Gay people found the courage to begin coming out of the closet and some straight people were willing to listen to them tell their stories, and in certain portions of the church the sins committed against Gay people were acknowledged, leading to repentance regarding the cruelty that had long been directed towards Gay people.
In those churches where things haven’t changed on this front what you will find is an unwillingness to engage in I-Thou relationships. Gay and Lesbian people are condemned from a distance by people unwilling to put out the effort required to listen to their stories, because its easier to cling to scriptures that support an “I-it” approach to Gay people.
In recent years, more and more people have been identifying as Transgender. It’s understandable that this fact would be challenging for many of us. This is confusing, new territory, challenging a basic assumption that physical anatomy and gender identity are inseparable. There are surely lots of questions that need to be asked about what this all means.
But let me say that here, too our Christian faith doesn’t allow us to render opinions and pass judgments about transgender people without first extending ourselves to be in real relationship with them – that is, to take the time to listen to them describe their experience. We are obliged to love Transgender people like Jesus, which is always a close-up kind of love.
And so let me tell you the story as I know it of a member of my extended family – somebody I’ve known for thirty years and my wife Sarah has known for over fifty years – the person who taught my wife how to drive. Teagan has been married to Sarah’s sister Kathy for nearly fifty years. For the first sixty plus years of Teagan’s life she went by the name “Thaddeus”. Teagan was born into a boy’s body but from very early on felt disconnected to this body. She has a clear memory from about the age of five seeing an attractive young woman coming down the street and thinking, “That’s what I’m going to be when I grow up.”
However, when she tried to express such a thought – or when she expressed interest in traditionally feminine things – her mother would severely shame her. Very early on Teagan got the message she’d better suppress such thoughts and desires or there’d be hell to pay, so she got in line in conforming to the expectations of others, going out of her way to do things and manifest qualities that fit the stereotype of masculinity. In college she joined ROTC and received the training that led to a career as a professional pilot. In the Air Force Reserves, she rose through the ranks, attaining the rank of a colonel, the commander of entire squadron.
Throughout her life Teagan put her nose to the grindstone, working hard and striving in every possible way to live a highly responsible life. She was a loyal partner to Kathy, with whom she raised two well-adjusted children to adulthood. She was also a devoted church member, faithful in attendance and serving in multiple leadership roles.
By the time I met Teagan she had long since perfected a masculine persona to such an extent that in her presence I sometimes felt a bit inadequate regarding my own masculinity – which is pretty weird, if you think about it.
But throughout Teagan’s life, deep down inside, she never escaped the feeling of being a fraud. There within her a great, unexpressed sadness.
As the years passed, she began to wonder if she could continue to endure life if she never had the opportunity to live out what she clearly felt was her true identity. At some point she shared her truth with Kathy who to Teagan’s great gratitude was able, over time to be supportive of Teagan’s dream.
And so, five years ago she took the brave step of publicly embracing her identity as a woman, changing the name she was known by from Thaddeus to Teagan. Teagan’s adult children met the news with acceptance and supportiveness, as did most of the extended family.
Those of us who have known Teagan are struck by a quality of joy she now manifests – something that had always been missing in the person we knew as “Thaddeus”. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit, evidence that the Holy Spirit has been guiding Teagan’s late in life journey.
In embracing her identity, there was however a price to be paid by both Teagan and Kathy. The church they had served in so faithfully turned their back on them, simply refusing to be in relationship with them, as did most of their friends from their hometown in south Jersey. They simply refused to make the effort to hear Teagan share her story, rendering judgements from afar.
Our church’s mission statement concludes with this line: “In a world where people feel they can love only those who are like themselves, we seek to celebrate the uniqueness of every human being.” The Holy Spirit makes it possible to love people who outwardly seem quite different from ourselves. It is our sinful nature that demands that people reflect back to us our own image before we are willing to offer them love.
As I’ve often said, if you enter a church and everybody there more or less looks the same and thinks the same – well be suspicious: the uniformity you witness may be a sign that it’s really just a social club (even if they use lots of religious language) rather than a church whose life blood is the Holy Spirit.
Though we surely aren’t perfect, there has always been a profound capacity within this church for the love that binds together people who outwardly seem quite different – as clear a sign as there is of the presence of the Holy Spirit.